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1.16.2006

From the Mouth of Sabes 

El Diario Del Lefty Malo has obtained from anonymous sources a snippet of the transcript of tomorrow's prerecorded Brian Sabean chat:

Moderator: Good afternoon, and welcome to MLB.com's "Brownnose Series" of chats with major league executives. Let's get retar...uh, it started!

DrichRaper: Brian, you've done such a fantastic job in your tenure, like a ballerina who never breaks a toe while dazzling the audience's eyes with petite yet muscular whirls and spins! Don't you think you get an unfair shake from the naysayers?


Brian Sabean
: Thanks for the kind words, Drich. There happens to be a slice or segment if you will of negativity-type people out there who are sitting on the outside looking in, but when it comes down to it, they don't see what I see from where I'm sitting, you know?

LF101: I love J.T. Snow! J.T. Forever! He is like, soooo hot! How could you trade him away to the White Sox? He was the greatest first-baseman ever! Wooo!

BS: J.T. Snow was a great man and is a great man. He was a man among Giants. A Giant-man, as they say. He had a loyal following among the fanbase, especially a certain demographic portion or segment, if you will, and he especially loved them back. He'll be sorely and surely missed, for sure. Both in the clubhouse and as a leader and a tremendous presence in a Giant uniform. But it was time to move in a different direction for both parties, especially our party, as far as parties go.

WinSharesAreAClumsyTool: Brian, Baseball America has consistently ranked the Giants' farm system in the lower seventh quadrant of the 46th percentile of the Win Effiency charts, normalized for park factor in both spring training and college-program antecedents.

BS: So what's the question?

WinSharesAreAClumsyTool: Why are you such an idiot?

BS: I can't say I agree with that assessment, although I can't say I understand what the hell you're talking about. I also blame Tidrow for whatever happened when I was getting married, like that Nathan-Pierzynski trade.

ELM138
: Brian, how do you see the Giants in 2008?

BS: I think Terry Donahue is a fine, capable, Giant of a man. A man among Giants, if you will. The transition will work well, and Terry will provide a solid, stable bridge over the waters of the future that we'll encounter in years to come as we move forward.

***

Two other comments on this MLK Day:

According to the St. Pete Times... Top officials from the Tampa Bay Devil Rays are privately talking about ideas that would change the entire look and identity of the team for the 2007 season - from the name to the colors to the logos to the uniforms. It seems likely the word "Devil" will be dropped. Then a decision has to be made whether to continue associating Rays with the sea creatures or to connect with the sun. Or there could be a new name, such as the Tampa Bay Tarpons.

If this comes true, the Rev. William Archibald Spooner will either be grolling in his rave or pickled tink.

A Hot Stove Quatrain

Light has been my blogging of late,
As winter's rains turn verdant the hills,
With baseball news so roguishly scant,
And the nagging need to pay off my bills.

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